Date and diarrhea.

[Jack Klompus]

Hey there! Ok... so it´s wednesday and you finally arrange a date with that great girl (guy) youve been dying to go out with. So you set your date to saturday at 8:00 pm. So lets suppose you eat 10 burritos, 5 tacos, 3 slices of pepperoni pizza and chinese food leftovers for dinner on friday . Result? You got the worst diarrhea ever on saturday (the big day, its your date!). It´s 7:00 pm.
So, what do you do?

[tgd_02]

GRAB A CORK
SHOVE IT UP UR UGLY ASS!

[Commando80]

Im liking tgd's idea. That, or you drink pickle juice and clean out everything within the hour.

[Cymru am byth]

eat a load of bananas to bung me up again :lol:

[Big Ozzie]

'Ello, BABE? We alls gots a problem heah, Sugar!
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tscampoli/fan_club_prescopy.jpg

[Colzi]

hysterics!

[Big Ozzie]

FIRST, that is why I wear the darkest shorts I can buy-Black, dark Blue, Gray, etc. Dark colors hide the skids, you can turn 'em inside out and wear 'em for a couple more days or a week.
SECOND, if I ever had this problem, I would make sure I ate plenty of Jalapeno Peppers so the neighbors can hear me Howl at the Moon when I evacuate.
AND THIRD, I would make sure my date ate whatever I ate...if she won't, slip some Ex-lax in her drink! Then get down with some GOOD 69 action and GET READY TO DUCK!

[tim2x]

immodium, immodium, immodium.......

[Rocker Kid]

Noooo way. It's not worth it if you have an "accident".

They may not like you for the night if you can't go.

They may not like you for the next who knows if you crap your pants in front of them!!!

[Big Ozzie]

Noooo way. It's not worth it if you have an "accident".

They may not like you for the night if you can't go.

They may not like you for the next who knows if you crap your pants in front of them!!!

That's why you don't wear pants! Then if there is an "accident" you can blame it on someone else ......."It was already there" or "Look what I sat in!" :D

[Cymru am byth]

you could always do what fudge packers do and wack a tampon up there

[Rocker Kid]

NOT WORTH IT

Do you want your future wife/husband to look at you funny or with a certain amount of caution or fear every time you ask to go to the bathroom or reach for the third slice of pizza or burrito?!

[Big Ozzie]

http://www.mypsp.com.au/img/gallery/homeralone427.jpg
BIG OZZIE'c Diarrhea Cure-All!

[Colzi]

Thats grate ozzie!

[Big Ozzie]

Thats grate ozzie!
THANKYOU, Thankyou! :D It will also work for the occasional 'Roid! :shock:

[Jack Klompus]

holly crap! :shock:

[Cymru am byth]

wheres the "ask if she's into scat" option?

[Big Ozzie]

wheres the "ask if she's into scat" option?

He left it at http://www.filecabi.net/video/church-of-fudge.html where they use a Bed Pan for an Offering Plate! :D

[Cymru am byth]

roflmao

[Merrillizer]

No way dood. One time in High School, I had to shit so bad when I was with this girl I was seeing, her sister, and another girl. The girl driving the car got pulled over and got a DWI, so I had to drive the car like 15 miles back to bring the sisters home. On the way I got one of those violent, cramp type fireshits. I felt it come over me like a wave of heat, and I started sweatin', and then I was fuckin hallucinating. It was the worst fucking thing ever. I shoulda stayed home LMFAO. I told the girls I had to PUKE, not shit. I lied and said I felt sick and when I got to their house I was gonna run in and puke. Yeah right, I had to shit so bad my whole body was fatigued from holding it in. On the way there going down the roads, I was secretly plotting a way to pull over, jump out, and run into the woods, shit in peace, then walk home. But I couldnt do it. We FINALLY get to their house, and I run in, fly up the stairs, and when I ripped my pants down, it was like krakatoa erupting. It was like shittin' seawater, or beer. LMFAO

[Rocker Kid]

No way dood. One time in High School, I had to shit so bad when I was with this girl I was seeing, her sister, and another girl. The girl driving the car got pulled over and got a DWI, so I had to drive the car like 15 miles back to bring the sisters home. On the way I got one of those violent, cramp type fireshits. I felt it come over me like a wave of heat, and I started sweatin', and then I was fuckin hallucinating. It was the worst fucking thing ever. I shoulda stayed home LMFAO. I told the girls I had to PUKE, not shit. I lied and said I felt sick and when I got to their house I was gonna run in and puke. Yeah right, I had to shit so bad my whole body was fatigued from holding it in. On the way there going down the roads, I was secretly plotting a way to pull over, jump out, and run into the woods, shit in peace, then walk home. But I couldnt do it. We FINALLY get to their house, and I run in, fly up the stairs, and when I ripped my pants down, it was like krakatoa erupting. It was like shittin' seawater, or beer. LMFAO

What. The. Hell. Did. You. Eat..........

[AllisterFiend]

Di-a-rrhe-a cha cha cha.

[Clouds in the Sky]

I was at this bar once and this guy wouldn't fuck off. Therefore, in all my glory I've proclaimed: "Dude, I'm sooooo sorry but I need to leave...I have explosive diarrhea."

Needless to say, he didn't bother me for the rest of the night.

[Jack Klompus]

No way dood. One time in High School, I had to shit so bad when I was with this girl I was seeing, her sister, and another girl. The girl driving the car got pulled over and got a DWI, so I had to drive the car like 15 miles back to bring the sisters home. On the way I got one of those violent, cramp type fireshits. I felt it come over me like a wave of heat, and I started sweatin', and then I was fuckin hallucinating. It was the worst fucking thing ever. I shoulda stayed home LMFAO. I told the girls I had to PUKE, not shit. I lied and said I felt sick and when I got to their house I was gonna run in and puke. Yeah right, I had to shit so bad my whole body was fatigued from holding it in. On the way there going down the roads, I was secretly plotting a way to pull over, jump out, and run into the woods, shit in peace, then walk home. But I couldnt do it. We FINALLY get to their house, and I run in, fly up the stairs, and when I ripped my pants down, it was like krakatoa erupting. It was like shittin' seawater, or beer. LMFAO

R0fL!!!
Sometimes, when you shit like that... you kinda get lost. It´s like you get away for a couple of seconds or something. There was this one time I kinda lost part of my consciousness there. It was scary actually.

[Big Ozzie]

http://foutware.ath.cx/public/owned.jpg

[Commando80]

that used to be my backround lol

[Colzi]

that used to be my backround lol

Lol not a very nice upbringing for ya then :roll:

[Cloudane]

Haha. That bog roll looks painful.

Certainly not, I'd probably claim that one of my relatives has gone into hospital or something, and milk the hugs and sympathy when we next meet before telling them that it was nothing serious :D